WHAT?!

Sphincter Golf is a lighthearted game that makes people laugh at themselves and at each other, creating an outlet for hilarity that, in our opinion, is sorely needed. Perfect for your next tailgate or awkward family gathering, it begs to be played by a crowd. The object is simple: place the cup on the ground, temporarily store coins between your glutes (outside the clothing!), transport them towards the cup without dropping, aim and release your best shot. Laugh, keep score and crown your champion!

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GAME PLAY

GAME PLAY

    • Expand the cup, twisting slightly to tighten in the upright position. Place on the ground and retreat backwards 5 steps.
    • Wedge coins exactly where you are thinking. Coins must be held in the sphincter region, not placed between the legs. COINS TO REMAIN OUTSIDE THE CLOTHING. No exceptions.
    • Clench your glutes and start your walk of shame…er…fame! Advance towards the cup without losing coins, aim, and release the coins. Jumping, shuffling, and toddling are all acceptable forms of passage.

SCORING

    • Players score 50 points for each wooden coin that lands inside the cup (whether it collapses or not).
    • Double the total score if all coins land in the cup.
    • OPTIONAL (but recommended!): add some spare change to the mix. Each coin’s point value is equivalent to its monetary value (e.g. penny = 1 point, quarter = 25 points).
    • Each player performs three attempted drops. Player with the overall combined high score wins!

No one likes yard game snobs, board game aristocrats or drinking game elites. Please try one, all or none. Better yet, create your own! You be you!

CUSTOM

    • Please submit your own version to @sphinctergolf or use #sphinctergolf
    • We will regularly review and if it makes the cut, we will add to this list for all to enjoy

BASEBALL

    • Game play is similar to the standard rules. However, instead of three tries (“innings”) per person, play a pre-determined number of innings. Whoever has a higher score after the last inning, wins.
    • If still tied, continue on to extra innings until one team has more points at the end of a full inning (meaning both players had an attempt)

FIRST TO [INSERT SCORE]

    • Play to a certain score, regardless of how many attempts it takes.  
    • Rotate turns between each player

P-I-G

    • Think “H-O-R-S-E” for basketball but replace the ball with a coin, the hoop with a cup and play to three letters.
    • Style on the approach and drop matters. One player goes first and if the attempted coin goes in, the second player must try to replicate as closely as possible.  If they cannot, they receive a letter.
    • If the first player misses their attempt, the second player starts with a clean slate and if made, the next player must replicate
    • If a player receives three letters, they are out. Play until one person is left standing

WORLD RECORD

    • Submit a video of the most attempted coins possible, regardless if they all go in or not.
    • If you make them all, you will be crowned

RELAY RACE (NEED TWO SETS)

    • Divide group into two teams with an equal number of people on each side

DUEL

    • 2-4  players start the same distance from a cup that is placed in the middle of them
    • Upon start, they each approach the cup from opposite directions in a race to see who can get their coin in the cup first
    • Players are not allowed to touch their opponents with their arms or hands. Boxing out with your butt is allowed if you can pull it off
    • If a player misses, then they must return to their starting point, lodge the coin and attempt again
    • Continue play until one player wins

ADD DRINKING “RULES” TO THE STANDARD GAME PLAY

    • Sloppy drop – If a player lose coins on the approach, meaning prior to an intentional shot into the cup, you must drink after your turn is complete
    • Perfect drop – If a player makes all of their coins in a single drop, they can assign a drink to another player