One hot summer day in the early 90’s, two brave parents and their three young sons ventured down the Green River on a guided overnight rafting trip. Late that night, as the boys drifted off to sleep in their tent, boisterous laughter and shouting erupted from the group of adults outside and awoke the brothers from their slumber. What was all the yelling about? And why was the group chanting their mother’s name?

The boys soon learned that their mother had championed a new game; she squeezed some coins between her butt cheeks, walked several paces, and dropped every last one of them into a cup placed on the ground. Eureka! Sphincter Golf was born.

Over the ensuing years as the brothers grew older and had children of their own, the tradition of family Sphincter Golf never waned. Now, in a society consumed with appearance and judgment, we proudly share this spectacle of absurdity and amusement.



# of coins dropped from sphincters since launch


# of sphincters harmed or killed in the making of this product


# of eligible sphincters to compete against


# of chances you get at life, so back that ass up